


but i'm willing to be (the one that you see in your dreams)

by peraltiagoisland



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: F/F, Please like this, also, based on quote prompt thingy!!, by hayley taylor, title based on lyrics of "no more wishing"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 13:08:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9729002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peraltiagoisland/pseuds/peraltiagoisland
Summary: Based on the quote prompt thing for tumblr, "You said my name in your sleep."In which Rosa has nightmares about Gina. But she has sweet dreams about her too, so maybe that balances things out.





	

**Author's Note:**

> IDK IDK I hope you all like this
> 
> and um if you're triggered by bad nightmares tread lightly??
> 
> please tell me what you think though!!

_"Gina! Move!" Rosa screamed as she watched Gina laugh, completely unaware of the bus that was barreling relentlessly toward her. Every fiber in Rosa's being wanted to go to Gina, push her out of the way, but no matter how hard she tried to move she was frozen, completely immobilized and most importantly, unable to save Gina._

_And no matter how hard she screamed, Gina just couldn't hear her. It seemed as if Rosa wasn't there at all._

 

* * *

 

Rosa had been having this reoccurring dream- although really, it was a nightmare. All those weeks when Gina had laid unconscious in the hospital, Rosa had busied herself with trying to come to terms with the incident. They all had. After knowing how much Gina's hospital bill would add up to when she woke up, Rosa got to work trying to see if there was some legal way she could get Gina's medical fees paid without making Gina go bankrupt.

So she reviewed the surveillance tapes at the site of Gina's accident, and checked all the statistics she needed to check (with a lot of help from Amy, although Rosa ended up going through everything herself too even after Amy had already looked at it all very thoroughly). But everything worked against Gina. The bus was going within the speed limit, even though to Rosa it seemed like it was zooming down the streets. Gina also wasn't crossing the road at a traffic junction; she had been jaywalking.

And despite how hard Rosa tried to help Gina, she failed to find someone at fault, someone to sue for money.

It all worked out in the end though; lots of people chipped in to this fund Jake and Amy suggested they start to pay for Gina's hospital fees. Loads of people from Gina's personal life, the Nine-Nine (some people didn't know Gina all that well personally, but was afraid she would find out they didn't contribute when she came back), and of course people from the bus company they bribed (more like threatened. Rosa was not proud of what she did, but at least she only went for the higher ups that were rolling in money). They paid Gina's medical bills in full.

And to top it all off, Gina woke up. And she was alive, and according to the doctors they were optimistic about a full recovery.

But Rosa still had those nightmares. She had started having them after she saw those tapes, and although the nightmares came less frequently after Gina woke up, they were still there, waiting patiently to pester and mock Rosa during the worst of times.

As the months went by, Rosa could tell when she was having these nightmares. A part of her would be conscious of the fact that it was a nightmare, and that Gina was safe. Yet as a whole, Rosa was still that same terrified broken creature, shrieking and begging over and over again, pleading for Gina to just move away, take a few steps aside.

The worst thing about Rosa's recurring nightmare of Gina's bus crash was that it was ever-evolving. It liked to change things up constantly; it was as if the dream had a mind of its own.

Sometimes, it would be a race car instead of a bus, and sometimes it would be a huge boulder. Other times, Gina wouldn't be laughing, but her face would be in tears and she would be staring the bus down, as if in complete understanding that if she were not to move, the bus would run her over.

Sometimes, the bus would do a lot more damage to Gina than she had seen it do in the recordings. There was once when Gina had taken a final look at Rosa before the bus came crashing into her- and that look was filled with anger, bitterness. Blame. With one single look, Rosa understood that she was somehow the reason Gina was standing in the middle of the street, waiting for the bus to knock her off her feet.

That nightmare had been the worst one out of them all.

The horrors that Rosa witnessed and came into close contact with on the job began to manifest themselves into the nightmares too. She'd see injuries of the victims in cases she worked painted on Gina's body, and they made Rosa really hate murder cases. The nightmares always got more frequent during a particularly bad case, and it made Rosa so driven to solve them just so she could sleep right.

It got to the point where she was beating Jake and Amy in arrest numbers, although to be fair they were both too busy being in love to really bother about being the best.

When Rosa managed to get her work to mostly stay out of her nightmares (the secret was half a bottle of scotch and an hour of yoga exercises to put her in a state of fuzzy calm before she slept), things started to get better. Gina had officially completed her physical therapy sessions in the hospital, and she was basically as good as new now. If one were to take a look at Gina, they wouldn't've guessed that Gina was run over by a bus once.

And before they knew it, it had been about a good two months after Gina had resumed all duties as the Nine-Nine's resident civilian administrator. Life had gone back to normal, and Rosa had went nightmare-free for around two months as well. It was thus easily inferable that Gina's safety had a direct correlation with Rosa's... stability. That realization was quite unnerving- it's always dangerous to have one's composure heavily reliant or dependent on another's well-being. It was also very pathetic, and Rosa didn't do pathetic. But Gina Linetti had a way about things, she supposed. Gina didn't even have to try and there Rosa was, a complete idiot for her.

One Friday afternoon, Gina waltzed into the middle of the bullpen and called for all the detectives to join her in the break room.

"What's this about?" Rosa asked as she casually crossed her legs, placing them haphazardly on top of the table as everyone else streamed into the room. "You know we have jobs to do, right?"

Gina seemed completely unfazed, yet offended all the same by that statement. "Rosa, when will you learn that I should be prioritized at a level higher than that of any and all police work? And yes, I should be the top priority around here, thank you for asking."

Rosa rolled her eyes, not at the absurdity of the statement, but instead at herself because she knew that deep down- Gina really was her number one priority.

"Anyway, I have an important announcement to make. Remember the bus? How I almost died but because I'm indestructible I only became stronger after it crashed into me?"

Everyone awkwardly made sounds of acknowledgement so Gina would carry on.

"Well, because the universe felt so bad for wrongly getting me in the bus crash, it has decided to bless me. Turns out the bus driver has a rich brother, and out of the guilt-ness of his heart for harming an angel walking the earth, he decided to give me a weekend long stay at his family's beach house!"

Everyone looked really excited now, but also kept their guard up. It was not an uncommon occurrence for Gina to bring them all aside to announce a good thing that had happened to her, and not involve any of them at all.

Gina took in all of their hesitant faces, and chuckled to herself. "He also said I could bring whoever I wanted, so I'm taking you losers with me!"

Everyone ignored the insult and began to cheer, whooping and celebrating this impromptu vacation. Captain Holt even nodded slightly.

And that was how they all ended up in the beach house of the bus driver who ran Gina over. Everyone had finished up early to go home and pack, before they all left the city together. They had a great Friday evening, indulging in food cooked by Charles but planned by Amy for dinner, and of course, drinking themselves silly.

Until Gina had dropped the announcement on them.

"I'm leaving the Nine-Nine for six months to join the academy. I'm gonna become a cop."

Everyone was shocked but supportive. Gina explained that she never felt like she was achieving her full potential stuck behind that desk whilst everyone else had "all the fun".

Of course, after everyone had displayed their skepticism regarding how 'fun' some aspects of police work were, Gina cracked and admitted that she did actually want to do her part in giving back to the community.

"I see people that push others around on the streets sometimes, but I'm always too scared to stop them. I wanna legally be able to beat up douchebags. I want to flash my badge at jerks in bars so they back off even faster. But most of all- we get into all sorts of crap situations at the Nine-Nine. And I'm sick of having to stay behind while all of you are part of the action out there. You guys always go out on cases and when you're back it's like- 'Oh! Remember when we caught the dude that did the thing? Wow, that was dope! Let's talk about it every week for three hours because I'm amaaaazing!! Cops rule!' Bleh." Gina further emphasized her point by making fart noises whilst she pointed both her thumbs down.

So basically, Gina wanted to become a cop, and everyone was very supportive. If Gina wanted something, she would get it. This was true most of the time, and Rosa knew it all too well. She had expressed her support for Gina by not protesting and nodding slightly.

But the moment Gina revealed that she was going to become a cop, and the moment Rosa realized she was serious about her decision, at the back of the mind she knew the nightmares would make a comeback. Even in her conscious state, Rosa was already picturing all the ways Gina's new career path could go wrong, all the ways Gina could get hurt, or even worse, killed, in the line of duty.

All Rosa could do was drink herself under the table, and hope for the best.

It didn't work, unfortunately.

 

* * *

 

_Gina was doing traffic duty, wearing the police uniform and sporting a bright neon yellow vest. She looked adorable, albeit very bored, as she waved her hands around giving signals to the drivers and pedestrians. She even checked her phone once in a while, which did not come as a surprise to Rosa. The surprise was that Gina remained mostly focused on the task of directing traffic flow._

_Moments later, Rosa lost sight of Gina and found herself on the road, driving through the streets leisurely. She looked down at the steering wheel her hands gently grasped onto, and on a subconscious level she frowned. She wasn't a fan of cars, much preferring the agility of motorbikes that could bypass traffic jams and the like._

_But then Rosa realized she wasn't driving a car, because the vehicle she was in was too big to be one._

_She was in a bus._

_And it was getting faster._

_On a subconscious level, Rosa began to panic and wanted to slam the brakes. She did not like where this was going._

_But in the dream, she didn't slow down but instead sped up, no matter how much she tried to stop the bus._

_And then Gina came back into Rosa's sight. Rosa was driving the bus, and she was speeding towards Gina at- something miles per hour. Whatever it was, it was much too fast._

_Rosa was using every ounce of willpower she had to stop the bus, to scream at Gina to get out of the way, as usual. But the Rosa in this nightmare had other ideas. It seemed she had planned this, had wanted this to happen. She felt herself step harder onto the accelerator. And worst of all, she felt herself smile._

_It was the most disturbing feeling, and further reinforced why Rosa hated smiles. Seconds before Rosa reached Gina everything seemed to slow down and Gina looked up. She saw the bus. She saw Rosa driving it. And the hurt, the look of betrayal on her face could've killed Rosa._

_Then Rosa ran Gina over. And the bus kept going._

_Rosa was wrong before, this was now the worst nightmare yet._

_Although she was still driving the bus, Rosa felt herself shaking. As in, she was physically getting shaken by someone. She heard faint murmurs of her name followed by quiet commands to wake up. And they got louder and louder and then Rosa found herself getting shaken awake by none other than Gina._

 

* * *

 

"What? What is it?" Rosa groaned as she sat up, clearing her throat as she rubbed her eyes free from sleep.

"You kidding me girl? Rosie, you were _screaming_."

Rosa swallowed awkwardly. So that explained her sore throat. Upon further observation, Rosa also realized that she was on the couch with Gina, and the lights were dimmed. Everyone had went to bed for the night. Except Rosa, who had apparently passed out on the couch, and Gina, who was sitting there with Rosa for some reason.

"Why aren't you in bed like the rest of them?" Rosa asked, almost hopefully.

"Had to take care of your drunk ass." Gina simply reasoned. "And everyone else's drunk ass. I just got done hauling Jake and Amy to bed. They're a very flirty handful. Trust me, you do not wanna get caught in the middle of that. Lucky for those horn dogs, I'm a helpful saint."

Rosa snorted, doing simple stretches to relax the strain that came with napping drunkenly on a couch. "I didn't ask you to take care of my drunk ass. You should've went to sleep."

Gina looked almost ready to roll her eyes. "You didn't have to ask. And someone had to be here to wake your screaming ass up."

Rosa shrugged. "Who doesn't scream in their sleep every now and then?"

"Whatever, Rosie. You could've brought the house to the ground. And also..." Gina looked more hesitant now. "You said my name in your sleep."

Rosa froze. "I said your name?" She wasn't exactly surprised at this, given how many times she had yelled out for Gina, enunciating every syllable, every letter even. But Rosa wasn't ready to come right out and admit that Gina was the star of her nightmares. The reason for them.

"Yeah." Gina shrugged. "Unless you know another Gina whose name's worth screaming." She said with a playful wink.

Rosa rolled her eyes, somewhat affectionately.

"Fine. I was... screaming your name." Rosa admitted.

"What were you dreaming about?" Gina asked, picking at her sweater. She looked nervous somehow, and this was not a Gina that Rosa was used to. She seemed way too vulnerable.

"You. Bad stuff. There was some suffering." Rosa didn't feel like elaborating.

"You associate me with bad stuff and suffering?" Gina said, almost offended.

"No. I associate you suffering with bad stuff." Rosa corrected.

"You dreamt about me suffering? From what? Syphilis?"

Rosa exhaled harshly, nearly laughing. "Syphilis? What- no, it wasn't syphilis. It was... it was the bus."

"Oh."

"It's a recurring nightmare for me. I saw it on tape when we were all trying to help you sue the bus company for money or whatever, and I started getting dreams about it." Rosa said, bouts of honesty tumbling out. "They're... bad dreams. Very bad. I don't think I've ever dreamt of anything as horrible as these nightmares. So yeah, I screamed."

"What happens in them?" Gina asked.

"You die." Rosa choked out. "Every time. And I keep trying to stop you but it never works and- you just keep, you keep dying."

Gina placed a hand around Rosa's trembling one and she seemed to calm down slightly.

"I'm sorry." Gina said, genuine guilt shrouding her voice. "I didn't mean to make you feel such pain."

"It's alright." Rosa said to comfort her. "I don't dream about it that often, especially not since you recovered."

"What happened today that made you dream like that again then?" Gina asked quizzically.

"You told us you were joining the academy." Rosa pursed her lips. "And I know you can do it, I believe that you can do it but- I can't help but worry. It's crazy. And stupid. But, I'm still paranoid. Which is lame." She ran her fingers through her hair. "I guess if you ask me to explain it it's kind of like how Jake took himself off the assignment when Amy went undercover as a pregnant inmate. He knew she was perfectly capable of handling herself and completing the case, but he still worried like an idiot and went rushing into the room every time she was in the same room as another inmate."

Rosa wasn't looking at Gina's face, but even if she had been it wouldn't have helped matters since the expression on Gina's face was utterly unreadable.

"So... you were worrying about me- like Jake was worrying about Amy."

"Yeah."

"Does Jake get nightmares about Amy?" Gina asked, almost rhetorically.

"Maybe. But then again, Amy didn't get run over by a bus."

"And again, I'm sorry my near-death experience gave you so much pain."

Rosa cleared her throat. "I guess... not all my dreams about you are about the bus. Sometimes it's just you, laughing and being- being you."

Rosa doesn't mention how she herself is in those dreams too, and they're always in some kind of slow, summer-like reality. She has dreams about Gina where they're dressed in casual wear, happy and giggling and just in pure, unadulterated bliss. Sometimes they're enjoying the sunshine and having a picnic on the grass, other times they're lying in bed wearing matching pajamas and it's raining outside. They do a lot of cuddling in the dreams. Rosa does not mention the cuddling. She can barely admit to herself about having dreamt about cuddling.

"Do we ever kiss in those dreams?" Gina asked out of the blue, and this caught Rosa off guard. Her expression gave away some confusion, fear, and then softened into a smile.

"Maybe." Rosa said, and if Gina didn't know any better, she would've thought Rosa was being coy.

"If we did, I can make your dreams into a reality." Rosa wanted to roll her eyes because that was just bad. Very bad. "And even if we didn't, I want to kiss you anyway."

And then all of Rosa's cynicism melted away as Gina leaned forward and pressed her lips against Rosa's own in a soft, almost longing kiss.

They almost hum at the relief the kiss brings them, Rosa feeling a sense of calm wash over her even as Gina pulled away.

"I've wanted to do that for a while." Gina admitted as she gently stroked the side of Rosa's cheek.

"Me too." Rosa replied, and suddenly she's never felt safer.

They fall into a peaceful sleep in the same bed that night, and then every night onwards. Gina promises to kiss the nightmares away, and to be there even if they are still to come and haunt Rosa. She doesn't need to, because the nightmares fade away once Rosa and Gina are together. She doesn't have those nightmares because her arms spend the nights draped or wrapped around Gina, the steady beat of her heart against Rosa a constant reminder that Gina was safe.

The nightmares dissolve into nothingness and are replaced, most probably permanently by sweet dreams. Slowly but surely, Rosa only ever sees Gina safe and sound in her dreams, laughing and teasing and playing without a care in the world. And Rosa's wretched screams disappear into the darkness where they belong, and she only ever sleeps with a content smile on her face.

 


End file.
